Dwarf Fortress Stories

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Dodge Machine

05 June 2013, 00:37 Rating: 15 [+]

The second year soon passes in Tunnelmountains. It is soon winter. All was good, food was plenty, drink was endless. Cage traps where placed near the entrance so intruders could be thought a lesson. War dogs where also breeding. In the there was a forgotten beast trying to get its name known, but it could not reach the fort, but that's beside the story.

Walls and a moat was about to be set when the liaison from the mountain homes came with a caravan. There where still not a bridge built to be raise when they entered the fort. Just as they  set the foot in, there was an ambush of goblins. The poor woodcutter outside never stood a chance. Everyone was called to the fortress for protection. Luckily there was not many outside that day. The dwarfs and the liaison got inside the fortress without problem.

There was no bridge to retract outside, but inside the fortress the dwarfs had built a ingenious trap to drown anyone that came too far in (including elf caravans). Alas, the goblins where lucky, they all but one stepped on cage traps. The last one fled in fear.

The dwarfs had a laugh and felt secure going outside again to drag the stupid goblins to their confinement. Trading started and discussions where had with the liaison. Replacing the cage traps and building the wall was of highest priority. Many dwarfs went outside to work. 

The goblin that fled called other goblin and 6 of them gathered for another ambush to rescue their friends. 

Their ambush where successful at first, they surprised a siege engineer and trapped two other dwarfs outside the walls. When they finished off the poor engineer they had fun with an alpaca.

Just outside the fort the dwarf Stakudothlest Buzat Enkos had enough of the goblins for one day, he  did not enjoy the goblins shooting arrows after the alpaca. He did not enjoy it all. Trained by the militia captain in the arts of combat, he jumped straight at the first goblin he saw. Armed with only a steel buckler he began bashing the goblin with the blood of armok himself rushing through his veins. Dodging arrows that what shot at him by the defending goblin with ease and such a grace you would think he was an elf and not a dwarf! Just as he dispatched of the first goblin, by crushing his bones with the buckler and biting him, the remaining 5 had noticed what happened. The 5 other goblins had crossbows and was loaded with bolts. There was no escape if the dwarf ran away, so he charged them alone. Dodging 4 bolts before he began bashing on the first one. Before he managed to kill the second goblin he dodged and blocked 11 bolts. ELEVEN bolts shot by the goblins and not one even scratched him. Such a feat is worthy of the legends. 

Charging at the third goblin, our dwarf became thirsty. Dodging so many bolts surely makes one want a mug of strawberry whine(our hero's recommended). Bashing, biting, wrestling, and dodging the bolts shot at him, he dispatches the third, fourth, fifth and sixth goblin with such ease it shames anyone ever shot a crossbow. The fight was glorious. Stakudothlest left the fight with out a bruise or scratch, all he could think of was his drink. The other dwarfs in the fortress just calls him The Machine. 

On the outside of the fortress lay the goblin in the dirt:

The kills:

And of course the weapon: