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Dwarf Fortress Report

26 June 2012, 12:02 Rating: 5 [+]


For years now, the goblins have been sending raiding parties and thieves to test the defenses of Portalwatch. Then, in the spring of 256, they sent a siege! A small army of 20 goblins approached from the East, met a hail of crossbow bolts, and ran away. Portalwatch thought it was safe.
That was a test, too.
In the Fall of that year, a larger army appeared. This vile force of darkness numbered in the 30s, and included trolls! They surrounded Portalwatch and marched in from the North, East, and Southwest. Thinking to make off with extra goods, they attacked just as a caravan from the nearby Dwarven nation was rolling in.
The caravan took the brunt of the damage, including one poor fellow who was left to fend for himself against six trolls.
Our steely-eyed commander, Milton, grouped the men at the front door and bade them wait. The approaching troops were met with a hail of bolts again, and as casualties began to break up their formations, Milton ordered the troops to attack.
He was immediately shot by an arrow and knocked out. The counterattack soon degenerated into a chaotic scene of running and fighting while bolts pelted goblins from the second story firing platforms. The primary goal was to put their archers out of commission, and to rescue the brave dwarf who even now had killed two trolls and was facing the other four.
During the fight, a goblin jumped the unconscious Milton, pounding on his head with a silver war hammer, every blow bouncing off of his helmet. This woke Milton up, who managed to get to his feet (no easy feat for a one-armed dwarf carrying a battle axe) and cut the goblin's leg off, leaving him to bleed out. The dwarf fighting the trolls died bravely and was buried with full honors. The caravan was slaughtered to a dwarf, and the proud Portalwatch herd of reindeer and assorted egg-laying fowl had mostly snuffed it. In fact, the first arrow loosed in the fight had been aimed at a chicken.
Milton was found among the dead, an axe-blow to the face being the one injury he couldn't simply wake up from.
He was the only casualty from Portalwatch. The survivors were left with a field of dead bodies, as shown in this artist's rendering. Each letter with a red background is a dead body. 'T' is for Trolls, 'g' is for goblins, 'c' is for chickens, 'R' is for reindeer, and there was even a flock buzzards (b) who got caught up in the rage. Milton is the yellow face surrounded by red, side by side with his killer, a goblin named Obok. The slashes (/) are expended bolts, mostly made from the bones of Mossog the forgotten beast from a couple of years ago.
The violence, while horrific, is still far from the most horrible thing we've ever seen in Dwarf Fortress.
The survivors immediately threw a party in the newly-created arena, which is where we make captured troglodytes fight a cougar.

This is Dwarf Blitzer, reporting for DNN.