Dwarf Fortress Stories

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Gentlemen, we can rebuild him, we have the technology

18 June 2012, 09:41 Rating: 175 [+]

I love how astoundingly broken the medical system can get when you have a legendary team.

It started when a forgotten beats melted one of my best soldiers, Mafol Kubuktathur, was melted with diseased blood. Every single body part was red.

The medical dwarves began their grisly works. The diagnosis was over almost instantly, and the surgeon began to remove what appeared to be all of the flesh. The infection had left it in such a state that it was all taken off. After that, bones were set. There were other injured dwarves, but none quite as severe as this one, so the process took about two months. The wounds over her entire body, from the surgery and the original battle were all sealed by adamantine thread and bandage. Another month spent recovering, with more wound dressing and suturing every other day, and she got out of bed. What at the time must have been little more than an adamantine suit with a pool of organ mush inside of it, stood up, and armed itself with the adamantine sword it used when it was still a dwarf, and straight away went back to the training room.

Now It is invincible. It cannot bleed to death, because there is no flesh to bleed from, and there is nothing left to infect, so I put it in a squad consisting only of this dwarf, and put it in a cage with a food chute and booze stockpile.

Now, when goblins or whatever show up to try to rape my fort, I just pull the lever and watch the carnage as the creature becomes a whirlwind of gore.

This was my most memorable Dwarf. All I could imagine while I was playing was the cheif medical dwarf saying "Gentlemen, we can rebuild him, we have the technology."